Handling Children When They Are Having Sibling Rivalry

A very common thing about siblings is that they fight like snake and mongoose over trivial issues. These fights are also a portrayal of their love for each other and it helps them become each other’s best friends in the future. When parents are raising two children, they are always competing in everything ranging from toys to attention. Sometimes it is very annoying and frustrating for parents to watch them fight. It becomes stressful for the parent to resolve conflicts between kids all the time. Montessori Hacienda Heights CA suggests ways in which parents can handle their kids and promote peace and calmness in their household.

Things to do when kids start fighting :-

The best way to get conflicts resolved themselves is to not get involved in the fight. Parents should step in only if they see that the verbal conflict is getting transformed into physical harm for the kids. Both the kids might expect their parents to invade and rescue them despite solving the problem themselves. Another thing that could cause resentment in the elder child is seeing that parents are protecting and supporting the younger one more. On the same note, the child who is being saved may feel that they can get away with anything they do since the parent supports them.

According to the teachers of the Montessori Hacienda Heights CA, some steps below might be considered by parents if they are getting involved in resolving the same -

  • Separate the kids until they become calm and cool. It is better that you give them space for some time and this shall help them not resume the fight again. If else, then the conflict might begin again. When their anger and restlessness subsides, you can bring them together to make peace and then make them understand, which can serve as a learning experience for them.
  • Do not put a lot of focus on which child is more at fault. No fight can occur if both of them are at some degree of fault. Hence, if the parent has to rebuke, he or she should do the same to both. This makes them feel that their parent to impartial to both.
  • As a parent, one should set up a win-win situation for both the kids. This would help both the kids gain something or the other. For example- if they are fighting for a single toy, then a parent, you can suggest a game for both of them where they can play together with the same toy.

Besides coping with a conflict, children also learn some developmental skills which would help them to lead a smooth and polished life in the future with good values and ethics. For example, they shall learn to value the perspective of other people. They also shall learn how to compromise as well as negotiate along with controlling negative impulses. If the conflicts between siblings are extremely out of control and parents are getting completely stressed out with the same, then they should seek professional help.